The End of Month 1- Day 31 (January 31st, 2021)

The end of month one and I feel many things. Excitement for the future alongside a very real fear of how everything is going to work out. Is it better to be accepted as a man I've never fundamentally been instead of facing an uphill climb as a transwoman and getting to live a more authentic life?

My little boy is still forming, still being knit together by Abba God. His name is a combination of mine and my wife's deceased fathers' middle names. What he represents for me is the toughest position I can imagine. Never fitting as a boy, now it's my job to help him find his place, to help him fit in a gender I mostly understand but don't relate to. There isn't a greater challenge I can imagine. But I also have to remember that if God has chosen him for us, He already has given me the knowledge and know-how to navigate this.

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