My Transition Journal

The story Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer tries to sell us is that the misfit toys have been abandoned or pushed to the edge of society. I instead like to see it as a collective choice was made. "We don't fit. So instead of trying to conform to shapes and functions that are expected by the powers that be, we'll celebrate our uniqueness alone from the world but together." This is my second time attending my local trans forum and it offers something not easily found in the outside world: universal understanding that we don't fit among the cookie cutter, the factory made, the already deemed acceptable. And what this produces is a group of people focused on lifting each other up above all else, a group void of ego and competition, a group that celebrates the small steps and the gargantuan. This is true equality and it only seems to exist on our little island. 

The life of a trans person is to hide. First to hide yourself from yourself (in my case) for the first 30 years of your life. And then to hide from those who don't understand, don't agree, don't feel comfortable.  Im not a person who likes to create waves. I don't enjoy arguing and stating my points unnecessarily. And I especially don't like being a constant topic of conversation. But I suppose it's what I was signed up for before I was ever born.  To the majority of those who no longer view trans people as people, we are now instead "that trans problem". That unsightly thing to hide, to avoid, to detest... to hate.  Many don't understand and don't put in the effort to even try. They see it as this political thing when in reality it as a human thing. A human thing many have not experienced or will ever have to. Growing up we learned the importance of trying to understand that life is not experienced the same way by all. Just because one experie

Signs of trans dehumanization: 1. Personal questions no longer apply: "So, are you going to get bottom surgery?" or "Are you going to get a boob job?" or "What's sex like now?" These "curious" questions are the equivalent to someone visiting an old freak show walk through and prodding the specimens. If you were to flip it and ask a cis person about sex or genitals you would most likely be on the receiving end of a possible lawsuit. But trans people are different? Of course. We don't mind talking about our greatest reasons for dysphoria. No. We are eager to talk about such naked and private topics... Of course the wrong response to such questions would be "I can show you if you're curious" but it also would be an effective way to make them feel as uncomfortable as we do in that moment.  Why is dehumanization okay? Regardless of how one feels about the validity of a transgender person, we are still owed the dignity of having l