Trans Dehumanization- Day 317 (November 15th, 2021)

Signs of trans dehumanization:

1. Personal questions no longer apply: "So, are you going to get bottom surgery?" or "Are you going to get a boob job?" or "What's sex like now?"

These "curious" questions are the equivalent to someone visiting an old freak show walk through and prodding the specimens. If you were to flip it and ask a cis person about sex or genitals you would most likely be on the receiving end of a possible lawsuit. But trans people are different? Of course. We don't mind talking about our greatest reasons for dysphoria. No. We are eager to talk about such naked and private topics...

Of course the wrong response to such questions would be "I can show you if you're curious" but it also would be an effective way to make them feel as uncomfortable as we do in that moment. 

Why is dehumanization okay? Regardless of how one feels about the validity of a transgender person, we are still owed the dignity of having lived a human life with years of human chapters belonging to us. Not alien or otherworldly--just simply not as easily definable as cis people.

2. Deadnaming long after the transition has begun:

Regardless of who you are, if I tell you I don't connect with the name given to me at birth, it is not your place to try and force it on me. I, just like countless other trans and non-binary people, have tried tirelessly and to a place of absolute exhaustion trying to find a way to make that name fit. The longer you try and fail, the less meaning it has. And eventually it's like an appendage that has become necrotic: if it isn't removed, it threatens to poison the rest of you. 

3. Making you feel invalid/guilty for your journey. 

This is probably a universal one. You've finally mustered up the courage to step into the unknown and leave the dying parts of you behind. But still people only find value in the old. They only reference the old. They talk about the old longingly while your present has become a constant reminder of who they lost. Often times they try and make you feel guilty, citing you as a constant source of their pain. 

We are nobody's property and we are not responsible for the happiness of others if it is to our absolute detriment.

Ultimately the reality of our lives is this: plagued with a lifelong condition of gender dysphoria, we now have sought out a permanent treatment/cure: gender transition. Though not as simple in personal-relationship theory, it is the equivalent to taking daily medication for the betterment of life overall.



 

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