No Value- Day 207 (July 27th, 2021)

My trans friend was attacked last night, attacked for no reason other than being who she is. It sickens me, infuriates me, and hurts me deeply. 

For so long I have wanted to meet people like me so that I could see that I still have value even as I step away from the gender I was born in and maybe even find people who love me for me. My hope was (and still remains) that the majority of people will shrug off my decision and realize ultimately I am still the same person as before, now just happier, and fuller, and more complete. And by making a good trans friend, I was hopeful that we could be support for each other on this long and arduous journey.

The reality instead is far sadder. People like me seem to have no value in this world. And we are all in it together but also entirely alone at the same time. Despite the support different people offer or the solidarity that is talked about, when you are in a park by yourself, none of it matters. Suddenly you are a smear on the window, something to just be "cleaned" away.

I can understand not agreeing with the trans life. Believe it or not there are times even trans people don't agree with all the details of trans life. What I can't understand is the complete devaluation of trans people. We aren't criminals or predators; more often than not we are people who found ourselves staring at a final choice: suicide or authentically lived lives.

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